A close shave

A friend of ours who's recently got a new job as a flight attendant on a major long haul airline (which shall remain nameless) told us this story from her maiden flight tonight.

Apparently there's two intercoms on big airplanes - one for us passengers and one private tanoy for staff. This private line broadcasts into the cockpit, 'backstage' and into the staff rest / sleep area.

The chief trolley pusher, frustrated by her staff skiving off, shouted down the private line - "Right you lazy cunts, get up - the pigs need feeding!"

Problem was, she'd lambasted them over the public line. The entire 747 had heard her!

Now, this is the very definition of quick thinking - she put on her most poshest voice and announced to the piglets:

"Could all passengers please note, the tanoy is for staff use only..."

Fantastic.